Young women are becoming more promiscuous, with more sexual partners than men, according to a new survey.
By the age of 21, they have had sex with an average of nine lovers - two more than their male partner. The poll of 2,000 by a magazine revealed that one in four young women has slept with more than 10 people, compared with one in five men who had done the same.
Young women are also twice as likely to be unfaithful, with 50 per cent admitting they have cheated on a partner - half at least twice. The survey follows an academic study branded Britain one of the casual sex capitals of the Western world, with residents having more one-night stands and more liberal attitudes than those in Australia, France, the Netherlands, Italy and the US.
"Our results show that after decades of lying back and thinking of England, today's twenty-something women are taking control of their sex lives and getting what they want in bed," the Telegraph quoted Lisa Smosarski, the editor the magazine More , as saying.
The survey found that only 1 per cent of young women said that they would wait until marriage to have sex, with the majority losing their virginity at 16. More than 50 per cent said that they were not in love with their first partner and only one in three believe it is important to be in love with someone before going to bed with them.
Seven out of 10 said they had had a one-night stand, with a fifth admitting to having had more than five casual encounters.
Also, 60 per cent said they would be prepared to do a "kiss-and-tell" and would sell their account of a one-night-stand with a famous person for 20,000 pounds.
Four out of 10 said they would marry for money or sleep with their boss if it meant they would get promoted, while a quarter would have an affair with a married man.
The survey also found young women are taking "huge risks" with their health, with 38 per cent not using a condom with a new partner and 16 per cent having contracted a sexually transmitted disease. However the respondents still claimed they are not having as much sex as they would like, with 13 per cent claiming their love life is "disappointing" and a further 10 per cent calling it "non-existent".
The survey also found that the average young woman has sex three times a week but would prefer to do it five times.
Source: TOI
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Perfect Sex Partners........
Do I have a perfect sex partner?" If not, how can I get one? Indeed a million dollar question that hovers in the minds of most couples!
Though it might be hard to find an absolute sexually compatible partner, but most couples don't even know the traits that they or their better half should posses to be a perfect sex partner.
Having an outstanding sex partner takes a huge burden off an individual's mind. It allows them concentrate more on the act, instead of thinking too much about whether they're making love to the right person or not. When it comes to a perfect sex partner, attributes like height, weight, age, behaviour, choices etc take a backseat. What matters is that he/she suits you and shares an amazing chemistry in the bedroom.
Dr. Kirti Mishra, a clinical physiologist and a relationship expert elucidates, "The idea of a perfect sex partner varies for different individuals, but some common traits like sexually active, experimental in bed, hygienically sound etc are a must, as they are the key for finding sexual bliss. Most couples today are working on their personal attributes to match their partner's prerequisites and thus become a perfect sex partner."
Apart from good looks, a hot body and a heady sex drive, let's explore the less superficial elements of what makes a perfect sex partner. And if your partner bears these qualities in bed, you can unquestionably boast of having a great sex partner...
1. Hygiene holds the key
Everyone likes making love to a clean and tidy partner, so good hygiene holds great importance in a sexual relationship. Ensure that your partner is well manicured with a fully waxed body to ensure a higher comfort level. Too much hair on body makes it uncomfortable to enjoy each inch of your lover. So look out for a soft and clean skin in your partner complemented with a nice smell, as a bad body odour is a huge turn-off.
Hot tip : "During sexual intimacy, everyone wants a hygienically fit partner, as this not only enhances the comfort level, but lets you enjoy the act more. So make sure you seem as fresh as if you have just stepped out of the shower before getting into bed. Sexual scents and aphrodisiacal fragrances are a good choice," recommends Dr. Devesh Roy, a sex therapist.
2. Oral sex shouldn't be an issue
You know what pleases you, so a wonderful partner to have in bed is one who doesn't hesitate going out of the way to give you that pleasure. If not routinely, your partner should be ready to please you orally as per their own mood and comfort level. While no one is perfectly adept at the oral act, but a partner who tries learning the little tricks to arouse you can surely add magic to your love life.
Hot tip : "Don't wait for your partner to tell you or give hints each time they feel like experiencing oral pleasure, instead make it a part of the love making act. It is quite safe and enjoyable as the actual act, so don't be unwilling to go for it," states Dr. Deepak Gupta, a sex expert.
3. Be an adventure lover
Intimacy and passion gets killed if you have a boring partner, who is having sex for the sake of it. Ensure that he/she makes every effort to heighten the sensation by exploring their adventurous side. Having a partner who is open to trying new sexual pleasures is a definite bonus. Right from participating in dirty talks, taking chocolate baths with you, trying out new positions to indulging in naughty love games, he/she should be keen to try sex escapades that make them a perfect bedroom partner.
Hot tip : "Like a weekend getaway gives you a much needed break, sex also can become monotonous after a sluggish period. To liven it up, you need to think out-of-the-box and try all kinds of sexual adventures that ensure a gratifying experience," shares Dr. Kirti.
4. A sexy shape can do wonders
Though weighty issues shouldn't come in way of your sexual pleasure, yet it's natural to look for a partner sans love handles or a bulging belly as an overweight partner can mar your sexual life. Being in top shape gives your body greater flexibility and accentuates your bedroom performance. If seeing your partner semi-naked makes you feel irresistible and you can't think of anything except sex, what else you can ask for!
Hot tip : "Good body shape is always welcomed and what adds to your sex appeal is an appropriate dressing sense with which you can underline your positive features and gear up for a hot bedroom romp. To be a perfect partner in bed, try shedding the accumulated fat on your belly or butt area to boost your performance," suggests Dr. Roy.
5. Propose newer things
It's excellent to take charge in bed sans any inhibitions. But what makes sex even more special is to bring new-fangled sex ideas and implement them. A vivid imagination and voracious desires can contribute to healthy sexuality. With an avid sex lover who is willing to try arousing positions in bed, use sex toys, suggest new ways to climax, explore alternate seduction techniques and foreplay acts, the sex romp can be one of its kind.
Hot tip : "Being innovative is good, but it is of no use if you confine this sexual knowledge just to yourself. Hence, be more forthcoming in your approach and propose new ways to improve your bedroom pleasure and perform actively," advices Dr. Kirti.
6. Fantasy sharing does magic
Communication holds the key to sexual pleasure, so a partner who is keen to discuss their wildest dreams and desires in bed can make sex a heavenly act. No partner can be tagged as sexually perfect until they are open about discussing their innate sexual preferences, as these tell the partner how they can perform. Look out for a partner who is not only open about their fantasies, but also invites you to share yours with a reassurance to fulfill them with ease.
Hot tip : "If you cannot be outspoken about your sexual fantasies, you may resort to measures like penning them down or recording them on a tape. But ensure that it reaches your partner at the right time before you slip between the sheets," says Dr. Gupta.
Source: TOI
Though it might be hard to find an absolute sexually compatible partner, but most couples don't even know the traits that they or their better half should posses to be a perfect sex partner.
Having an outstanding sex partner takes a huge burden off an individual's mind. It allows them concentrate more on the act, instead of thinking too much about whether they're making love to the right person or not. When it comes to a perfect sex partner, attributes like height, weight, age, behaviour, choices etc take a backseat. What matters is that he/she suits you and shares an amazing chemistry in the bedroom.
Dr. Kirti Mishra, a clinical physiologist and a relationship expert elucidates, "The idea of a perfect sex partner varies for different individuals, but some common traits like sexually active, experimental in bed, hygienically sound etc are a must, as they are the key for finding sexual bliss. Most couples today are working on their personal attributes to match their partner's prerequisites and thus become a perfect sex partner."
Apart from good looks, a hot body and a heady sex drive, let's explore the less superficial elements of what makes a perfect sex partner. And if your partner bears these qualities in bed, you can unquestionably boast of having a great sex partner...
1. Hygiene holds the key
Everyone likes making love to a clean and tidy partner, so good hygiene holds great importance in a sexual relationship. Ensure that your partner is well manicured with a fully waxed body to ensure a higher comfort level. Too much hair on body makes it uncomfortable to enjoy each inch of your lover. So look out for a soft and clean skin in your partner complemented with a nice smell, as a bad body odour is a huge turn-off.
Hot tip : "During sexual intimacy, everyone wants a hygienically fit partner, as this not only enhances the comfort level, but lets you enjoy the act more. So make sure you seem as fresh as if you have just stepped out of the shower before getting into bed. Sexual scents and aphrodisiacal fragrances are a good choice," recommends Dr. Devesh Roy, a sex therapist.
2. Oral sex shouldn't be an issue
You know what pleases you, so a wonderful partner to have in bed is one who doesn't hesitate going out of the way to give you that pleasure. If not routinely, your partner should be ready to please you orally as per their own mood and comfort level. While no one is perfectly adept at the oral act, but a partner who tries learning the little tricks to arouse you can surely add magic to your love life.
Hot tip : "Don't wait for your partner to tell you or give hints each time they feel like experiencing oral pleasure, instead make it a part of the love making act. It is quite safe and enjoyable as the actual act, so don't be unwilling to go for it," states Dr. Deepak Gupta, a sex expert.
3. Be an adventure lover
Intimacy and passion gets killed if you have a boring partner, who is having sex for the sake of it. Ensure that he/she makes every effort to heighten the sensation by exploring their adventurous side. Having a partner who is open to trying new sexual pleasures is a definite bonus. Right from participating in dirty talks, taking chocolate baths with you, trying out new positions to indulging in naughty love games, he/she should be keen to try sex escapades that make them a perfect bedroom partner.
Hot tip : "Like a weekend getaway gives you a much needed break, sex also can become monotonous after a sluggish period. To liven it up, you need to think out-of-the-box and try all kinds of sexual adventures that ensure a gratifying experience," shares Dr. Kirti.
4. A sexy shape can do wonders
Though weighty issues shouldn't come in way of your sexual pleasure, yet it's natural to look for a partner sans love handles or a bulging belly as an overweight partner can mar your sexual life. Being in top shape gives your body greater flexibility and accentuates your bedroom performance. If seeing your partner semi-naked makes you feel irresistible and you can't think of anything except sex, what else you can ask for!
Hot tip : "Good body shape is always welcomed and what adds to your sex appeal is an appropriate dressing sense with which you can underline your positive features and gear up for a hot bedroom romp. To be a perfect partner in bed, try shedding the accumulated fat on your belly or butt area to boost your performance," suggests Dr. Roy.
5. Propose newer things
It's excellent to take charge in bed sans any inhibitions. But what makes sex even more special is to bring new-fangled sex ideas and implement them. A vivid imagination and voracious desires can contribute to healthy sexuality. With an avid sex lover who is willing to try arousing positions in bed, use sex toys, suggest new ways to climax, explore alternate seduction techniques and foreplay acts, the sex romp can be one of its kind.
Hot tip : "Being innovative is good, but it is of no use if you confine this sexual knowledge just to yourself. Hence, be more forthcoming in your approach and propose new ways to improve your bedroom pleasure and perform actively," advices Dr. Kirti.
6. Fantasy sharing does magic
Communication holds the key to sexual pleasure, so a partner who is keen to discuss their wildest dreams and desires in bed can make sex a heavenly act. No partner can be tagged as sexually perfect until they are open about discussing their innate sexual preferences, as these tell the partner how they can perform. Look out for a partner who is not only open about their fantasies, but also invites you to share yours with a reassurance to fulfill them with ease.
Hot tip : "If you cannot be outspoken about your sexual fantasies, you may resort to measures like penning them down or recording them on a tape. But ensure that it reaches your partner at the right time before you slip between the sheets," says Dr. Gupta.
Source: TOI
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Lies That Women Tell.............. ; )
Though a recent study claims that a woman's face is like an open book that reveals her state of mind, but men need to beware!
Better not take it as the last verdict, for irrespective of how much you trust and adore your little angel, women do lie to their significant others at times.
Sometimes to carry off a situation without hurting his feelings or to save herself from trouble, while on occasions to contain her emotions and pose as Ms. Goody...popping casual, white lies is no big deal for women when it comes to playing it safe in the relationship.
White lies are no big blunders or massive betrayals, but small lies or 'truth manipulated' to handle a situation. At times she might fib to make her man feel better, to avoid a fight, or an embarrassing situation.
Here's a little help so that men can figure out when their adorable darling is not speaking her heart out and help them handle the situation with care...
Lie #1: "Oh! It's fine. I'm OK"
Guards on guys! You must know that she's not fine at all and nothing is OK. And sooner or later you will have to bear the burnt of her pent up emotions that she has somehow managed to hold back until now. You'll find her taking this emotional defense on occasions when you may have forgotten her birthday, taken her for granted or have done anything that hurts her.
"Whenever my girlfriend lets go off my not so fatal error with a cool 'it's fine', I know it's nothing but the calm before a cyclone that I am fated to face in the time to come," shares Sandeep Sharma, a Delhi-based management student.
To portray that she doesn't care, the emotional lady prefers taking a refuge in this lie. Charu Marwah, a software engineer admits, "I prefer staying that 'It's OK' because if I react I'll be blamed of being a constant cribber, who is in complaining mode always. Though, I actually want him to go down on his knees and plead forgiveness."
Lie detector : Well, an experienced lover would know of the crime that he has committed, but the amateurs should look out for her reactions. She might not get vocal, but will do everything to make you feel guilty about the fact that you have hurt her. From being tight-lipped to giving the briefest responses that don't go beyond 'hmms, huhs or yes and no', to mean tones and loads of sarcasm - are a few hints that you can look out for. "Women have a tendency of expecting their man to understand the said, as well as the unsaid, and that leaves men in a dicey situation. And even here, by keeping quite or going away with a small 'I'm fine', she expects him to know that she’s hurt," explains psychologist, Dr. Aruna Broota.
Lie # 2: "I love you for what you are"
...and I don't want you to change. Well, may God be your saviour if you believe her for this. No wonders, if sheer pampering or impressing you might strictly be on her mind when she's saying this. "I just loved my wife whenever she averred this phrase. But gradually the knick-picking started and reality dawned upon me. At times it was my eating choice that bugged her, while at others it was my dressing style that she wanted to improve. Yet she continued to tell the blatant lie that she loved me for what I was," complained Madhukar Suhas, a Mumbai-based advertising professional.
Agreed, that you don't like this lie. But just imagine how it would feel if on your face she told you much she hated your paunch or how bad you looked in those lose-fitted denims. Thank her appreciating you taking care of your confidence levels.
"What do I do? I have to blow his trumpet when he does the right thing. After all, it was his qualities only that I married him for. And also, it becomes important to boost his confidence at times and those words just have the right impact," says Madhu Chandra, a Delhi-based-teacher.
Lie detector : If you start observing the occasions when she backs this mushy phrase, you might just realise she's not lying at all. On most of the occasions it comes when you have made her happy with anything like a gift, a movie, a romantic dinner or for that matter by doing anything and everything that she loves. You were good to her and that's your innate quality, which made her fall for you.
Lie # 3: You stare, I don't care!
Either you are too lucky to have the coolest woman by your side, or you are getting an inflated ego without any reason if you believe her on this. No matter how hard she tries to look cool and composed, but the fact remains that no woman loves it when her man ogles at another woman. "After all, who wants to feel like second best? And the 'I don't care attitude' is usually to hide the vulnerability and a pretence. Most women hate their man staring at another woman," confesses Radhika Khattar, a Delhi-based housewife.
Lie detector : She doesn't want to show you how she's feeling and is no less desperate to tell you that you are torturing her to the core. Well, easy indications to know she's lying can be the trail of questions she'll end up asking you. Casually and candidly she'll ask you things like 'Isn't she hot?' 'What makes her so hot? 'Did you like her?' She might appear to be your best buddy, but actually she wants to ask you, 'Do I score less that the chic you are ogling at?' And your answer will decide your fate not immediately, but definitely in the future, so better beware of what you say!
Lie # 4: Your friends are cool!
This might not be a lie always, but many a times your friends are nothing but a 'passion spoiler' for your girl, especially when they pop up during private moments. "When we started dating, on many occasions we went out with my friends. And every time I used to ask her, 'I hope you are enjoying?' she answered, 'They're cool!' The real shock came when one day I was planning another group date and she gave me a good piece of her mind. It's then that I realised that she didn't love them as much I thought she did. But she could have initially told me," says Rajat Sarin, a 20-year-old college student.
"Most of the times women end up praising your friends for you. They don't want to hurt you by revealing the truth and hope that you'll understand without saying, which usually doesn't happen," explains psychologist, Dr Sameer Parekh.
Lie detector : A sure shot hint to the lie is written on her face. Despite being in the group she'll remain an outsider. The smile that's usually worth a million dollars might just look purely artificial and forced. Her replies to all your enquiries will end in a cover up lie, 'I'm fine sweet heart' or 'I'm enjoying myself' and that takes you to Lie #1. So, when you get something like this from your girl, understand that you are getting into too much buddy-bonding!
Lie # 5: Tell me, trust me I won't get angry
This one is tricky, leaving you with a ditch on one side and a bigger ditch on the other. This lie is usually thrown at you when she wants an honest opinion and knows what it can be, but still wants to hear it. Beware guys! Irrespective of what you say, she is going to get furious for sure. This usually happens in questions related to her looks, the food that she cooks, that tangy orange shirt she brought for you etc.
"Sometimes it is tough to handle. Once, my wife asked my honest opinion on a super tight dress that she had worn. And, I told her honestly that she was looking like a stuffed pillow and she was mad at me. Taking cues from my past experience; on another occasion I did my best to flatter her. To my sheer surprise, even that made her angry and she blamed me for not being a fair critic," complains Suraj Malhotra, a Delhi-based architect.
Lie detector : Well, there's no detector for this one, for undoubtedly she's lying. Then what's the solution? Answers Parekh, "It's not that women cannot take true criticism from their man or expect praises all the time. But what they actually expect is that criticism should come in a softer and suggestive manner, rather than a striking taunt on her looks. So, without being too critical or over flattering, just tell her that she needs to work out on her minuses."
PHEW! This was from us. Now it's your turn to share the sweet and salty white lies that you tell your man or your wife pours on you to leave you playing a guessing game of truth and false.
Source: TOI
Better not take it as the last verdict, for irrespective of how much you trust and adore your little angel, women do lie to their significant others at times.
Sometimes to carry off a situation without hurting his feelings or to save herself from trouble, while on occasions to contain her emotions and pose as Ms. Goody...popping casual, white lies is no big deal for women when it comes to playing it safe in the relationship.
White lies are no big blunders or massive betrayals, but small lies or 'truth manipulated' to handle a situation. At times she might fib to make her man feel better, to avoid a fight, or an embarrassing situation.
Here's a little help so that men can figure out when their adorable darling is not speaking her heart out and help them handle the situation with care...
Lie #1: "Oh! It's fine. I'm OK"
Guards on guys! You must know that she's not fine at all and nothing is OK. And sooner or later you will have to bear the burnt of her pent up emotions that she has somehow managed to hold back until now. You'll find her taking this emotional defense on occasions when you may have forgotten her birthday, taken her for granted or have done anything that hurts her.
"Whenever my girlfriend lets go off my not so fatal error with a cool 'it's fine', I know it's nothing but the calm before a cyclone that I am fated to face in the time to come," shares Sandeep Sharma, a Delhi-based management student.
To portray that she doesn't care, the emotional lady prefers taking a refuge in this lie. Charu Marwah, a software engineer admits, "I prefer staying that 'It's OK' because if I react I'll be blamed of being a constant cribber, who is in complaining mode always. Though, I actually want him to go down on his knees and plead forgiveness."
Lie detector : Well, an experienced lover would know of the crime that he has committed, but the amateurs should look out for her reactions. She might not get vocal, but will do everything to make you feel guilty about the fact that you have hurt her. From being tight-lipped to giving the briefest responses that don't go beyond 'hmms, huhs or yes and no', to mean tones and loads of sarcasm - are a few hints that you can look out for. "Women have a tendency of expecting their man to understand the said, as well as the unsaid, and that leaves men in a dicey situation. And even here, by keeping quite or going away with a small 'I'm fine', she expects him to know that she’s hurt," explains psychologist, Dr. Aruna Broota.
Lie # 2: "I love you for what you are"
...and I don't want you to change. Well, may God be your saviour if you believe her for this. No wonders, if sheer pampering or impressing you might strictly be on her mind when she's saying this. "I just loved my wife whenever she averred this phrase. But gradually the knick-picking started and reality dawned upon me. At times it was my eating choice that bugged her, while at others it was my dressing style that she wanted to improve. Yet she continued to tell the blatant lie that she loved me for what I was," complained Madhukar Suhas, a Mumbai-based advertising professional.
Agreed, that you don't like this lie. But just imagine how it would feel if on your face she told you much she hated your paunch or how bad you looked in those lose-fitted denims. Thank her appreciating you taking care of your confidence levels.
"What do I do? I have to blow his trumpet when he does the right thing. After all, it was his qualities only that I married him for. And also, it becomes important to boost his confidence at times and those words just have the right impact," says Madhu Chandra, a Delhi-based-teacher.
Lie detector : If you start observing the occasions when she backs this mushy phrase, you might just realise she's not lying at all. On most of the occasions it comes when you have made her happy with anything like a gift, a movie, a romantic dinner or for that matter by doing anything and everything that she loves. You were good to her and that's your innate quality, which made her fall for you.
Lie # 3: You stare, I don't care!
Either you are too lucky to have the coolest woman by your side, or you are getting an inflated ego without any reason if you believe her on this. No matter how hard she tries to look cool and composed, but the fact remains that no woman loves it when her man ogles at another woman. "After all, who wants to feel like second best? And the 'I don't care attitude' is usually to hide the vulnerability and a pretence. Most women hate their man staring at another woman," confesses Radhika Khattar, a Delhi-based housewife.
Lie detector : She doesn't want to show you how she's feeling and is no less desperate to tell you that you are torturing her to the core. Well, easy indications to know she's lying can be the trail of questions she'll end up asking you. Casually and candidly she'll ask you things like 'Isn't she hot?' 'What makes her so hot? 'Did you like her?' She might appear to be your best buddy, but actually she wants to ask you, 'Do I score less that the chic you are ogling at?' And your answer will decide your fate not immediately, but definitely in the future, so better beware of what you say!
Lie # 4: Your friends are cool!
This might not be a lie always, but many a times your friends are nothing but a 'passion spoiler' for your girl, especially when they pop up during private moments. "When we started dating, on many occasions we went out with my friends. And every time I used to ask her, 'I hope you are enjoying?' she answered, 'They're cool!' The real shock came when one day I was planning another group date and she gave me a good piece of her mind. It's then that I realised that she didn't love them as much I thought she did. But she could have initially told me," says Rajat Sarin, a 20-year-old college student.
"Most of the times women end up praising your friends for you. They don't want to hurt you by revealing the truth and hope that you'll understand without saying, which usually doesn't happen," explains psychologist, Dr Sameer Parekh.
Lie detector : A sure shot hint to the lie is written on her face. Despite being in the group she'll remain an outsider. The smile that's usually worth a million dollars might just look purely artificial and forced. Her replies to all your enquiries will end in a cover up lie, 'I'm fine sweet heart' or 'I'm enjoying myself' and that takes you to Lie #1. So, when you get something like this from your girl, understand that you are getting into too much buddy-bonding!
Lie # 5: Tell me, trust me I won't get angry
This one is tricky, leaving you with a ditch on one side and a bigger ditch on the other. This lie is usually thrown at you when she wants an honest opinion and knows what it can be, but still wants to hear it. Beware guys! Irrespective of what you say, she is going to get furious for sure. This usually happens in questions related to her looks, the food that she cooks, that tangy orange shirt she brought for you etc.
"Sometimes it is tough to handle. Once, my wife asked my honest opinion on a super tight dress that she had worn. And, I told her honestly that she was looking like a stuffed pillow and she was mad at me. Taking cues from my past experience; on another occasion I did my best to flatter her. To my sheer surprise, even that made her angry and she blamed me for not being a fair critic," complains Suraj Malhotra, a Delhi-based architect.
Lie detector : Well, there's no detector for this one, for undoubtedly she's lying. Then what's the solution? Answers Parekh, "It's not that women cannot take true criticism from their man or expect praises all the time. But what they actually expect is that criticism should come in a softer and suggestive manner, rather than a striking taunt on her looks. So, without being too critical or over flattering, just tell her that she needs to work out on her minuses."
PHEW! This was from us. Now it's your turn to share the sweet and salty white lies that you tell your man or your wife pours on you to leave you playing a guessing game of truth and false.
Source: TOI
Thursday, February 12, 2009
10 Kissin Commandments...............
"Our date was extremely romantic, until I offered to seal the night with a kiss, which unexpectedly turned out to be quite awkward. While, I was gravely ashamed, she never came back," shares 23-year-old, Rishi Gulati (name changed on request), a sad victim of a kissing-faux-pas.
Well, the misfortune of a bad kiss can fall upon any of us. Consider yourself lucky if your kiss left your partner craving for more. And keep your fingers tightly crossed for no one plans a kissing blunder, it simply happens! And mind it, you are hardly left with anything to mend the embarrassment caused by a 'dud kiss.' If a perfect kiss can register success in your relationship, a kissing bummer is good enough to bring your love journey to a dead end even before it starts.
Follow our '10 commandments of perfect kissing' and you'll never be tagged as a 'poor kisser'...
1. Thou shall not be a stinking fish
Nothing can kill a kiss like foul breadth. So, the first commandment keeps you off kissing, if your mouth is stinking due to hygiene issues, food, tobacco or excessive smoking. If you don't want your partner to remember the kiss for all the wrong reasons, try to look out for solutions. Dr. Kamal Bisht, a general physician suggests, "Begin by brushing your teeth before you go out on a date, irrespective of the time. Cleaning your tongue is also important as it removes bacteria. Avoid kissing if you have just had smelly food products like garlic, onions etc. Keep a breath spray handy and use it periodically throughout the day." Last but not the least, if you are a smoker, the pleasure of smooching your partner can be your motivation to kick the butt!
2. Thou shall open your mouth with care
"My girlfriend has this habit of opening her mouth very little while kissing, which does not allow me to enjoy a passionate kiss to the fullest," avers Rajdeep Bhawmik, a Delhi-based architect.
While, there's no accurate rule for opening the mouth, it's generally seen that a deep kiss using tongue is a huge turn on. Equally terrifying are gulpers who open their mouth wide open while kissing, ready to swallow their partner. The trick is to keep one's lips lose enough to let the lips of both the partners glide smoothly over each other making it a yummy kiss. Also, “start with a lip-to-lip kiss and gradually taste the depths of pleasure," suggests sex expert, Dr. Rajan.
3. Thou shall not be a dead dud
"For both men and women, responsiveness is the chief factor that makes for a better kisser," says author William Cane in his book, The Art of Kissing Book of Question and Answers . So, rather than pouncing upon your partner's mouth, try and figure out the styles and movements that your partner enjoys. Try to figure out his/her likes and dislikes and adapt your technique accordingly.
Going with the other partner's rhythm is crucial. Don't expect your beau to do all the work while you enjoy his kissing moves. "My girlfriend is a hesitant kisser. She doesn't even move her head; forget about getting playful with her tongue and lips. It's just like I'm trying to find pleasure with a stiff stick," reveals Chandan Gupta, a 20-year-old college student.
4. Thou shall be a learner
No body is a born kisser. So, if you are an amateur kisser, who is apprehensive about locking lips, just follow your partner and the rest will fall into place, the way it happened with Jayati and Mayank. "During the initial days of our courtship, my girlfriend Jayanti was quite clueless about kissing, which was a big turn-off for me. But soon she realised her awkwardness and made a smart move. She simply started copying my style and now she can beat me in a passionate kiss," tells Mayank Taneja, a Mumbai-based PR professional.
Remember kissing is all about adapting and learning.
5. Thou shall use your hands appropriately
Agreed, that using hands results in elevating levels of passion. But do not pull his hair or grab her waist as if she'll run if you leave. Kissing is about imparting pleasure rather than inflicting pain. “Keep your hand movements limited to sensual and soft strokes on your lover's arms, back, neck, waist and hair or simply cup the face,” suggests Cane. Don’t get too aggressive in the name of showing wild passion. "My first boyfriend almost gave me bruises every time we kissed. Pinching and grabbing me gave him a sense of high, but I failed to match up with his wild passion and we broke up after a few dates and kisses," relates Madhurima Goel, a 19-year-old college student.
6. Thou shall not let your tongue go loose
You don't have to gag your partner by shoving off your tongue deep down into his/her mouth. Take it easy. The kissing rule for tongue says –less is more! Let the tip of your tongue perform the magic with subtle and gentle strokes. You can use your tongue for exploring, but that doesn't allow you to reach between your partner's teeth –as it can be a big turnoff. "Remember, slower the tongue movements, hotter is the passion," says Dr. Shivi Jaggi.
7. Thou shall not give me a saliva bath
Wet kisses undoubtedly work when it comes to getting into some raunchy action, but that doesn't give you the liberty to go lap,lap,lap all over your partner's face. "My girl is a passionate kisser. But, the only problem with her is that her kisses are really wet. She licks my chin, cheeks, forehead etc, which becomes quite messy for me," complains Jatin Sharma, a 24-year-old, management student. So, slobbery is not welcomed while kissing.
8. Thou shall not have sex on your mind
It is not necessary for a kiss to end in some hot action between the sheets. Your kiss shouldn't give away the hint that you are getting desperate to hit the bed. "Kissing brings people close physically and emotionally. And this closeness satisfies a deep emotional need for connecting with your partner," explains Cane.
So, while you are kissing, be sensitive to your partner's need. He/she may or may not be ready for sex immediately. Don't use a kiss as a means to reach a sexual climax. Let your kiss be romantic rather than plain sexual.
"I can still remember my first kiss, though for unpleasant things. The way the guy was busy groping me, gave clear clues that he wanted to have sex with me on our first date itself and I wasn't ready. And soon after that date, within no time I made up my mind to never meet him again."
Another way to keep your first kiss plain romantic, rather than hard core sexual can be to keep your hand-work limited to the non-erotic zones like the neck, arms, back waist etc., rather than reaching out to the erotic zones. Though, imagination and experimentation can be your yardstick if both of you are ready and enjoying.
9. Though shall not stare while kissing
You might be curious; you might feel like watching your partner taking pleasure in the act, but continuously staring at him/her while kissing is a big no no! Whenever a person is enjoying something to the hilt, their eyes automatically shut. Closing the eyes is an autonomous stimulus to pleasure. So, kissing is no exception to this rule and people tend to close their eyes. “Also, the sight of your partner almost eating you might not look very beautiful if you watch it continuously, though there's nothing wrong in getting a peep every now and then," suggests Dr. Rajan.
10. Thou shall be confident of your kiss
Be it a plain pucker or a passionate lip lock, not just the initiator, but even the recipient ought to be confident. Remember, to go with the flow and you'll do fine. When passion reaches its zenith, no guide-book or tips remain in one's mind. So, just be yourself and let the warmth of your lips take over. "Be it approaching your lover for a kiss or accepting his proposal, both should be utmost confident. Jitters may spoil the mood, irrespective of who is getting them," explains Dr. Jaggi.
Well, the misfortune of a bad kiss can fall upon any of us. Consider yourself lucky if your kiss left your partner craving for more. And keep your fingers tightly crossed for no one plans a kissing blunder, it simply happens! And mind it, you are hardly left with anything to mend the embarrassment caused by a 'dud kiss.' If a perfect kiss can register success in your relationship, a kissing bummer is good enough to bring your love journey to a dead end even before it starts.
Follow our '10 commandments of perfect kissing' and you'll never be tagged as a 'poor kisser'...
1. Thou shall not be a stinking fish
Nothing can kill a kiss like foul breadth. So, the first commandment keeps you off kissing, if your mouth is stinking due to hygiene issues, food, tobacco or excessive smoking. If you don't want your partner to remember the kiss for all the wrong reasons, try to look out for solutions. Dr. Kamal Bisht, a general physician suggests, "Begin by brushing your teeth before you go out on a date, irrespective of the time. Cleaning your tongue is also important as it removes bacteria. Avoid kissing if you have just had smelly food products like garlic, onions etc. Keep a breath spray handy and use it periodically throughout the day." Last but not the least, if you are a smoker, the pleasure of smooching your partner can be your motivation to kick the butt!
2. Thou shall open your mouth with care
"My girlfriend has this habit of opening her mouth very little while kissing, which does not allow me to enjoy a passionate kiss to the fullest," avers Rajdeep Bhawmik, a Delhi-based architect.
While, there's no accurate rule for opening the mouth, it's generally seen that a deep kiss using tongue is a huge turn on. Equally terrifying are gulpers who open their mouth wide open while kissing, ready to swallow their partner. The trick is to keep one's lips lose enough to let the lips of both the partners glide smoothly over each other making it a yummy kiss. Also, “start with a lip-to-lip kiss and gradually taste the depths of pleasure," suggests sex expert, Dr. Rajan.
3. Thou shall not be a dead dud
"For both men and women, responsiveness is the chief factor that makes for a better kisser," says author William Cane in his book, The Art of Kissing Book of Question and Answers . So, rather than pouncing upon your partner's mouth, try and figure out the styles and movements that your partner enjoys. Try to figure out his/her likes and dislikes and adapt your technique accordingly.
Going with the other partner's rhythm is crucial. Don't expect your beau to do all the work while you enjoy his kissing moves. "My girlfriend is a hesitant kisser. She doesn't even move her head; forget about getting playful with her tongue and lips. It's just like I'm trying to find pleasure with a stiff stick," reveals Chandan Gupta, a 20-year-old college student.
4. Thou shall be a learner
No body is a born kisser. So, if you are an amateur kisser, who is apprehensive about locking lips, just follow your partner and the rest will fall into place, the way it happened with Jayati and Mayank. "During the initial days of our courtship, my girlfriend Jayanti was quite clueless about kissing, which was a big turn-off for me. But soon she realised her awkwardness and made a smart move. She simply started copying my style and now she can beat me in a passionate kiss," tells Mayank Taneja, a Mumbai-based PR professional.
Remember kissing is all about adapting and learning.
5. Thou shall use your hands appropriately
Agreed, that using hands results in elevating levels of passion. But do not pull his hair or grab her waist as if she'll run if you leave. Kissing is about imparting pleasure rather than inflicting pain. “Keep your hand movements limited to sensual and soft strokes on your lover's arms, back, neck, waist and hair or simply cup the face,” suggests Cane. Don’t get too aggressive in the name of showing wild passion. "My first boyfriend almost gave me bruises every time we kissed. Pinching and grabbing me gave him a sense of high, but I failed to match up with his wild passion and we broke up after a few dates and kisses," relates Madhurima Goel, a 19-year-old college student.
6. Thou shall not let your tongue go loose
You don't have to gag your partner by shoving off your tongue deep down into his/her mouth. Take it easy. The kissing rule for tongue says –less is more! Let the tip of your tongue perform the magic with subtle and gentle strokes. You can use your tongue for exploring, but that doesn't allow you to reach between your partner's teeth –as it can be a big turnoff. "Remember, slower the tongue movements, hotter is the passion," says Dr. Shivi Jaggi.
7. Thou shall not give me a saliva bath
Wet kisses undoubtedly work when it comes to getting into some raunchy action, but that doesn't give you the liberty to go lap,lap,lap all over your partner's face. "My girl is a passionate kisser. But, the only problem with her is that her kisses are really wet. She licks my chin, cheeks, forehead etc, which becomes quite messy for me," complains Jatin Sharma, a 24-year-old, management student. So, slobbery is not welcomed while kissing.
8. Thou shall not have sex on your mind
It is not necessary for a kiss to end in some hot action between the sheets. Your kiss shouldn't give away the hint that you are getting desperate to hit the bed. "Kissing brings people close physically and emotionally. And this closeness satisfies a deep emotional need for connecting with your partner," explains Cane.
So, while you are kissing, be sensitive to your partner's need. He/she may or may not be ready for sex immediately. Don't use a kiss as a means to reach a sexual climax. Let your kiss be romantic rather than plain sexual.
"I can still remember my first kiss, though for unpleasant things. The way the guy was busy groping me, gave clear clues that he wanted to have sex with me on our first date itself and I wasn't ready. And soon after that date, within no time I made up my mind to never meet him again."
Another way to keep your first kiss plain romantic, rather than hard core sexual can be to keep your hand-work limited to the non-erotic zones like the neck, arms, back waist etc., rather than reaching out to the erotic zones. Though, imagination and experimentation can be your yardstick if both of you are ready and enjoying.
9. Though shall not stare while kissing
You might be curious; you might feel like watching your partner taking pleasure in the act, but continuously staring at him/her while kissing is a big no no! Whenever a person is enjoying something to the hilt, their eyes automatically shut. Closing the eyes is an autonomous stimulus to pleasure. So, kissing is no exception to this rule and people tend to close their eyes. “Also, the sight of your partner almost eating you might not look very beautiful if you watch it continuously, though there's nothing wrong in getting a peep every now and then," suggests Dr. Rajan.
10. Thou shall be confident of your kiss
Be it a plain pucker or a passionate lip lock, not just the initiator, but even the recipient ought to be confident. Remember, to go with the flow and you'll do fine. When passion reaches its zenith, no guide-book or tips remain in one's mind. So, just be yourself and let the warmth of your lips take over. "Be it approaching your lover for a kiss or accepting his proposal, both should be utmost confident. Jitters may spoil the mood, irrespective of who is getting them," explains Dr. Jaggi.
Sunday, February 8, 2009
Is Your Partner Cheating on You??.....
Infidelity seems to have become synonymous with relationships in today's fast paced, urban life. So, if your partner is temperamental, spending less time with you, or saying no to sex much too often, there are chances that he/she is having an affair.
While accepting this may be easier said than done, but it is certainly better to know the bitter truth than to hurt yourself and regret later. Here are some signs to watch out for...
Is he/she distancing himself/herself from you?
If there is an uncomfortable distance between both of you and you are clueless as to how to bridge the gap or if your partner has been ignoring you recently, it is likely that he is looking for affection outside your relationship. Sudden changes in his/her behaviour may be the tell tale signs of an affair.
Anuradha Taneja (name changed on request), 33, a homemaker confesses, "I have been feeling distanced from my husband in the last few months. He is never interested in listening to me. Whenever I ask him for advice, he asks me to take my own decisions, he keeps himself pre-occupied with work and his friends and it seems as if he is deliberately avoiding me. I am confused and helpless."
Tell tale signs: Manmeet Bhalla, a marriage and relationship counselor suggests, "It is normal for stress and work pressures to create conflicts between couples occasionally. However, if it is happening too often, it is important for couples to share their concerns. Communication is the most effective way to bring you closer."
Is he/she losing interest in sex?
Is he/she temperamental when it comes to getting physically intimate? Does he/she make excuses for not having sex with you? Avoiding intimacy is a sure shot sign to figure out that that your partner is losing interest in you. While it is normal for such incidents to happen occasionally, but if you have been observing these traits much too frequently, there's a possibility that he/she is cheating on you.
Devendra Rai (name changed on request), 29, who works with a multinational company in Gurgaon says, "My wife is just not into me from the last few months. Whenever I try to get intimate with her, she either tells me that she is too tired to have sex or is not in the mood. She is irritable and is losing interest in me. I have even tried talking to her about the problem, but she keeps avoiding these conversations."
Agreeing with Devendra, Kriti Kapoor (name changed on request), 35, a businesswoman, confesses, "My husband had been losing interest in sex since last few months. Even when I tried to take an initiative, he told me he is not in the mood and avoided me. I recently got to know through a common friend that he has an affair with his college friend who was also his ex girlfriend. I didn't trust my friend until I saw them together at a pub late night where I had gone to attend my friend's party."
Tell tale signs: Sunil Garg, an expert on sex-related issues suggests, "It is vital for couples to share their expectations when it comes to physical intimacy. Distancing yourself from each other will only add to the problems. Physical display of affection is important to sustain a relationship."
Does he/she argue with you on petty issues?
If your partner is irritable or argumentative on petty issues, looks for reasons to initiate a heated discussion and never respects your opinion, it may be a sign of trouble brewing in your paradise. Accretion of these signals could point to something more ominous happening in your world.
Poonam Biswas (name changed on request), 27, who works with an advertising agency confesses, "My boyfriend has been behaving absurdly in the last few weeks. We just don't seem to agree on anything. He finds faults with everything I say and accuses me of being overtly possessive. I have noted a drastic change in his behaviour suddenly."
Tell tale signs: "Mutual trust and understanding is the key to a successful relationship. Suspecting each other puts a serious dent in your relationship and the damages are often irrecoverable. You may not agree on everything, but it is necessary to respect each other's opinions during a conversation," adds Manmeet.
What does his body language say?
Observing your partner's body language may be an effective way to find out if he is losing interest in you. As the old adage goes, 'Actions speak louder than words'. So, if he/she is just not into you anymore, his/her body language will tell all.
Anuj Mittal (name changed on request), 32, who works at a private bank in Delhi says, "My wife and I have recently started arguing more often in the last six months. She comes back late from work and often tells me that she has to go out for dinner with one of her clients. When I tried asking her about her associations, she gets offended and looks nervous, she starts fumbling and walks out of the room. For the next one week, she avoids talking to me. I later read an SMS on her cell phone from her client asking her to meet him for a movie. I just couldn't believe it. She later confessed to me that she was having an affair with him and now wants a divorce from me."
Tell tale signs: Savita Mishra, a body language expert explains, "Your body language influences what other people think or feel about you. Say, if you have a habit of touching your nose while having a conversation, it can be perceived as a sign of deception. Not maintaining eye contact, looking away, sweating heavily may also be some signs by which you can identify dishonesty. When people are being dishonest, their gestures and words aren't in sync. If he/she assumes a defensive position or immediately changes the subject, gets up from the chair and suddenly walks out of the room, it may mean that they are lying and are getting defensive."
Does he/she compare/criticise you?
If your man/woman keeps criticising your appearance, your attire, your behaviour or compares you with his/her colleagues or his/her friend's girlfriend/boyfriend, you can assume that he/she is looking for lame excuses to part from you. It may be the right time to tell your partner 'Enough is enough'.
Tanvi Mitra (name changed on request), 26, a PR professional agrees, "My hubby has been behaving strangely over the last few months. He has a very close friend at his workplace who is a lady and he always keeps comparing me with her. It annoys me, but whenever I try to explain my feelings to him he gets irritated."
Tell tale signs: "Mocking or criticising your partner is equivalent to disrespecting him/her. Even if your relationship is going through a rough patch, it is best to keep yourself from venting out your frustration on each other," says Archana Nanda, a psychologist.
Does he/she hide things from you?
The easiest way to find out whether or not your partner is having an affair is to keenly observe his behaviour and his belongings. If he/she is too possessive about his/her laptop, leaves the room whenever he/she is on phone or deletes messages from his/her message box and is cautious while checking his E-mails when you are around, there is definitely something that he is hiding from you.
Priyanka Ahuja (name changed on request), 33, a homemaker shares, "My husband is very possessive about his mails and cell phone. In fact, I recently came to know that he has another cell phone which I wasn't aware of. Whenever I ask him about his whereabouts, he says, 'I am out for some work'. He also avoids taking my calls. I am feeling insecure and helpless."
Tell tale signs: "If you are confused as to whether your suspicions are real or it's just the fear of losing your partner, it is important to be sure before accusing your partner of having an affair. It is also important to weigh your options before causing damage to your relationship," adds Archana.
Does he avoid taking you out for parties/dinners?
If your partner leaves for work early and comes back late, evades spending time at home, often goes out for business trips or official parties and deliberately avoids taking you along, is reluctant to introduce you to his friends/colleagues or avoids being spotted with you in public places, you are most likely being duped.
Yamini Sachdev (name changed on request), 34, who works with an insurance company in Indore says, "My husband never takes me along to his official parties, whereas his colleagues bring along their spouses on some occasions. He keeps talking on the phone for late hours and whenever I ask him, he just says that he is on an official call."
"Infidelity can be a painful experience. If either you or your partner have been unfaithful, it would be better to discuss the reasons that caused you to seek love outside your relationship. Finding the causes of the problem may give you a better understanding of the situation. You may also seek professional help if required," suggests Manmeet.
rakshita.pandey@indiatimes.co.in
Source:TOI
While accepting this may be easier said than done, but it is certainly better to know the bitter truth than to hurt yourself and regret later. Here are some signs to watch out for...
Is he/she distancing himself/herself from you?
If there is an uncomfortable distance between both of you and you are clueless as to how to bridge the gap or if your partner has been ignoring you recently, it is likely that he is looking for affection outside your relationship. Sudden changes in his/her behaviour may be the tell tale signs of an affair.
Anuradha Taneja (name changed on request), 33, a homemaker confesses, "I have been feeling distanced from my husband in the last few months. He is never interested in listening to me. Whenever I ask him for advice, he asks me to take my own decisions, he keeps himself pre-occupied with work and his friends and it seems as if he is deliberately avoiding me. I am confused and helpless."
Tell tale signs: Manmeet Bhalla, a marriage and relationship counselor suggests, "It is normal for stress and work pressures to create conflicts between couples occasionally. However, if it is happening too often, it is important for couples to share their concerns. Communication is the most effective way to bring you closer."
Is he/she losing interest in sex?
Is he/she temperamental when it comes to getting physically intimate? Does he/she make excuses for not having sex with you? Avoiding intimacy is a sure shot sign to figure out that that your partner is losing interest in you. While it is normal for such incidents to happen occasionally, but if you have been observing these traits much too frequently, there's a possibility that he/she is cheating on you.
Devendra Rai (name changed on request), 29, who works with a multinational company in Gurgaon says, "My wife is just not into me from the last few months. Whenever I try to get intimate with her, she either tells me that she is too tired to have sex or is not in the mood. She is irritable and is losing interest in me. I have even tried talking to her about the problem, but she keeps avoiding these conversations."
Agreeing with Devendra, Kriti Kapoor (name changed on request), 35, a businesswoman, confesses, "My husband had been losing interest in sex since last few months. Even when I tried to take an initiative, he told me he is not in the mood and avoided me. I recently got to know through a common friend that he has an affair with his college friend who was also his ex girlfriend. I didn't trust my friend until I saw them together at a pub late night where I had gone to attend my friend's party."
Tell tale signs: Sunil Garg, an expert on sex-related issues suggests, "It is vital for couples to share their expectations when it comes to physical intimacy. Distancing yourself from each other will only add to the problems. Physical display of affection is important to sustain a relationship."
Does he/she argue with you on petty issues?
If your partner is irritable or argumentative on petty issues, looks for reasons to initiate a heated discussion and never respects your opinion, it may be a sign of trouble brewing in your paradise. Accretion of these signals could point to something more ominous happening in your world.
Poonam Biswas (name changed on request), 27, who works with an advertising agency confesses, "My boyfriend has been behaving absurdly in the last few weeks. We just don't seem to agree on anything. He finds faults with everything I say and accuses me of being overtly possessive. I have noted a drastic change in his behaviour suddenly."
Tell tale signs: "Mutual trust and understanding is the key to a successful relationship. Suspecting each other puts a serious dent in your relationship and the damages are often irrecoverable. You may not agree on everything, but it is necessary to respect each other's opinions during a conversation," adds Manmeet.
What does his body language say?
Observing your partner's body language may be an effective way to find out if he is losing interest in you. As the old adage goes, 'Actions speak louder than words'. So, if he/she is just not into you anymore, his/her body language will tell all.
Anuj Mittal (name changed on request), 32, who works at a private bank in Delhi says, "My wife and I have recently started arguing more often in the last six months. She comes back late from work and often tells me that she has to go out for dinner with one of her clients. When I tried asking her about her associations, she gets offended and looks nervous, she starts fumbling and walks out of the room. For the next one week, she avoids talking to me. I later read an SMS on her cell phone from her client asking her to meet him for a movie. I just couldn't believe it. She later confessed to me that she was having an affair with him and now wants a divorce from me."
Tell tale signs: Savita Mishra, a body language expert explains, "Your body language influences what other people think or feel about you. Say, if you have a habit of touching your nose while having a conversation, it can be perceived as a sign of deception. Not maintaining eye contact, looking away, sweating heavily may also be some signs by which you can identify dishonesty. When people are being dishonest, their gestures and words aren't in sync. If he/she assumes a defensive position or immediately changes the subject, gets up from the chair and suddenly walks out of the room, it may mean that they are lying and are getting defensive."
Does he/she compare/criticise you?
If your man/woman keeps criticising your appearance, your attire, your behaviour or compares you with his/her colleagues or his/her friend's girlfriend/boyfriend, you can assume that he/she is looking for lame excuses to part from you. It may be the right time to tell your partner 'Enough is enough'.
Tanvi Mitra (name changed on request), 26, a PR professional agrees, "My hubby has been behaving strangely over the last few months. He has a very close friend at his workplace who is a lady and he always keeps comparing me with her. It annoys me, but whenever I try to explain my feelings to him he gets irritated."
Tell tale signs: "Mocking or criticising your partner is equivalent to disrespecting him/her. Even if your relationship is going through a rough patch, it is best to keep yourself from venting out your frustration on each other," says Archana Nanda, a psychologist.
Does he/she hide things from you?
The easiest way to find out whether or not your partner is having an affair is to keenly observe his behaviour and his belongings. If he/she is too possessive about his/her laptop, leaves the room whenever he/she is on phone or deletes messages from his/her message box and is cautious while checking his E-mails when you are around, there is definitely something that he is hiding from you.
Priyanka Ahuja (name changed on request), 33, a homemaker shares, "My husband is very possessive about his mails and cell phone. In fact, I recently came to know that he has another cell phone which I wasn't aware of. Whenever I ask him about his whereabouts, he says, 'I am out for some work'. He also avoids taking my calls. I am feeling insecure and helpless."
Tell tale signs: "If you are confused as to whether your suspicions are real or it's just the fear of losing your partner, it is important to be sure before accusing your partner of having an affair. It is also important to weigh your options before causing damage to your relationship," adds Archana.
Does he avoid taking you out for parties/dinners?
If your partner leaves for work early and comes back late, evades spending time at home, often goes out for business trips or official parties and deliberately avoids taking you along, is reluctant to introduce you to his friends/colleagues or avoids being spotted with you in public places, you are most likely being duped.
Yamini Sachdev (name changed on request), 34, who works with an insurance company in Indore says, "My husband never takes me along to his official parties, whereas his colleagues bring along their spouses on some occasions. He keeps talking on the phone for late hours and whenever I ask him, he just says that he is on an official call."
"Infidelity can be a painful experience. If either you or your partner have been unfaithful, it would be better to discuss the reasons that caused you to seek love outside your relationship. Finding the causes of the problem may give you a better understanding of the situation. You may also seek professional help if required," suggests Manmeet.
rakshita.pandey@indiatimes.co.in
Source:TOI
Top 10 sizzling sex secrets revealed!
Want to spice up your bedroom life? Well then here's a new book that offers you some red-hot tips, which will take your sex life to new heights
Sizzling Sex , written by Dr Pam Spurr, is full of fun and saucy advice, reports the Sun . It offers 250 tips altogether including kissing techniques, naughty positions, games with food and lots more.
Here are 10 of the best bits of advice from the book:
For women
1. A lip-smacking kiss: By alternating the movement of your tongue between a swirling action and a poking action, amazing sensations are created.
2. Perfectly sexy pinching: Slowly introduce a pinching sensation and she may start to feel incredibly aroused.
3. The ‘Naughty Dog’ Kiss: This kiss is perfect for stimulating her by using it on different parts of her body. What you need to do is allow your tongue to relax.
4. The Roman Bath: Ask her to share a bath with you. Add some aromatherapy oil and slip in first. Ask her to get in and sit inside your legs with her back towards you. Trickle some warm water from a face cloth down her neck and back and gently kiss the back of her neck with your lips. Then slide your arms around her ribcage and stroke the whole of her breasts.
For men
5. Buff him up: Tell him you want to enhance his sense of touch and offer to exfoliate his chest and neck area.
6. Turn it into an SEP - Simple Erotic Pleasure: Take the exfoliating scrub, rub it between your fingertips and then gently circle the skin on his chest and neck area with it. Whenever you kiss these areas during foreplay it will feel far more sensitive to him.
7. Footie Heaven: Men have incredibly sensitive feet. And by stimulating different points on his feet you'll send pulses of pleasure up through his body.
8. Inner Wrist Magic: While you're kissing him is to begin stroking his inner wrist. This is an incredible erogenous zone that's definitely neglected in men.
9. The pearl necklace technique: Get out an old beaded necklace - a fake pearl one is ideal. Touch his moan zones with your hands and with lashings of lubricant start moving them up and down.
For both men and women
10. Blindfolded lust: Put blindfolds on each other at some point during foreplay. Once blindfolded you'll be amazed at how quickly your skin comes to life as you are touched, and as you touch your lover.
Sizzling Sex , written by Dr Pam Spurr, is full of fun and saucy advice, reports the Sun . It offers 250 tips altogether including kissing techniques, naughty positions, games with food and lots more.
Here are 10 of the best bits of advice from the book:
For women
1. A lip-smacking kiss: By alternating the movement of your tongue between a swirling action and a poking action, amazing sensations are created.
2. Perfectly sexy pinching: Slowly introduce a pinching sensation and she may start to feel incredibly aroused.
3. The ‘Naughty Dog’ Kiss: This kiss is perfect for stimulating her by using it on different parts of her body. What you need to do is allow your tongue to relax.
4. The Roman Bath: Ask her to share a bath with you. Add some aromatherapy oil and slip in first. Ask her to get in and sit inside your legs with her back towards you. Trickle some warm water from a face cloth down her neck and back and gently kiss the back of her neck with your lips. Then slide your arms around her ribcage and stroke the whole of her breasts.
For men
5. Buff him up: Tell him you want to enhance his sense of touch and offer to exfoliate his chest and neck area.
6. Turn it into an SEP - Simple Erotic Pleasure: Take the exfoliating scrub, rub it between your fingertips and then gently circle the skin on his chest and neck area with it. Whenever you kiss these areas during foreplay it will feel far more sensitive to him.
7. Footie Heaven: Men have incredibly sensitive feet. And by stimulating different points on his feet you'll send pulses of pleasure up through his body.
8. Inner Wrist Magic: While you're kissing him is to begin stroking his inner wrist. This is an incredible erogenous zone that's definitely neglected in men.
9. The pearl necklace technique: Get out an old beaded necklace - a fake pearl one is ideal. Touch his moan zones with your hands and with lashings of lubricant start moving them up and down.
For both men and women
10. Blindfolded lust: Put blindfolds on each other at some point during foreplay. Once blindfolded you'll be amazed at how quickly your skin comes to life as you are touched, and as you touch your lover.
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