From ages we have been told to stick to one fact - be ‘brutally honest’ with your partner in all aspects of life
However, do we all follow that golden rule? Before you start feeling guilty, allow me to tell you that you are not the only one living with white lies in your relationship. The place where people feel most comfortable lying is their bedroom.
If women lie about their vital stats, men also fudge about the numerous sex partners they have had. May be it helps them in keeping the romance alive in their den. So here are some of the truths that most of the people prefer keeping under the wraps.
Fake it!
From once in a while to all the time, most couples fake an orgasm to avoid upsetting their partner. This is pretty common among the fairer sex.
Revati Prasad, who works with a Noida- based MNC says, “Like all other girls, I spoke at length about lovemaking with my friends before getting married. But when it came to practicing it, I literally got cold feet. It’s been eight months, but it’s rare that I reach an orgasm. I find intercourse a painful act. Because of hesitation and the fear of rejection, I keep mum. I think it would affect my husband’s ego if I tell him that he fails to satisfy me.”
Dr Sanjay Chugh, a psychiatrist suggests, “At times men also fake an orgasm, but it’s mainly a female dominated phenomenon. There can be several reasons like guilt, fear of getting pregnant, no desirability for the partner or painful intercourse. Not necessarily you reach the big ‘O’ all the time, but faking it for long to save your partner from embarrassment is not the right thing to do in bed. Talking about the issue frankly will certainly help.”
I forgot the count
Most of the men consider women as extremely possessive beings. Therefore, they generally manipulate the number of women they have shared ‘good’ times with.
Rakesh Aggarwal, a marketing executive tells, “No women love competition, therefore I make no effort to bother my girls. It’s my ninth affair in four years, but I think I am really serious this time. She is my colleague in office. She does know that I am not a virgin, but I am in no mood to tell her that I have made love to almost half a dozen women.”
Dr Kamal Khurana, a relationship expert says, “It’s not only about women, men also don't think highly of women who have had several sex partners in their past. This is the main factor why people prefer to lie about their ex partners. It’s definitely a personal choice, but keeping your partner in the absolute dark is unfair. If not completely, try to share some of details of your past with your mate.”
It was fun honey!
You were in between the act and your partner pushed you to try a new position. You found it awkward and it wasn’t that pleasurable too. Still you preferred to say, ‘it was great’. Many people can relate to this situation.
Reema Sinha, a content writer reveals, “Me and my guy were on a weekend break. I was really looking forward to some rocking action in bed. It was all going good before I found myself in a funny position. I think he was enjoying our new sex position, but I burst out into laughter, and my man was very disturbed seeing my reaction. So, I decided that I will let him experiment the way he wants.”
Dr Sanjay Chugh explains, “It’s a great thing to try out new ways to attain a high point with your partner in bed. Nobody likes to stick to a monotonous sex routine for too long. But you need to be considerate towards you partner’s comfort too. Keep in mind that it becomes difficult for women to attain the big ‘O’ in certain positions.”
Sizeable issues
Who goes to bed with a measuring tape in hand? And that makes it easy for everybody to boast about their vital stats.
Chitra Rawat, a media person says, “Men simply adore women who are blessed with a nice cleavage and my boyfriend is no different. Thanks to all the inventions in terms of lingerie, it is easier to look a size bigger. I think it's fair enough to misguide him this much, if it gives him a sexual high. The only problem I face is, I can’t go for lingerie shopping with him.”
“Most of the men have a fascination for women with fuller figures. And if you know how to take advantage, than there is nothing like it. At times men also brag about their size. It's better not to make claims that you may not be able to sustain for long. It may cause embarrassment to both of you,” tells Dr Khurana.
Virginity values...
Virginity still seems to be a big deal when it comes to marriage. No matter how modern people claim to be, they still want a virgin while getting married.
Suparna Gupta, an architect confesses, “I have been in an intense relationship in my past, because of his family issues we couldn’t take it forward. Now I am getting married to another guy. With my sexual behavior, he might get to know that I am not a virgin. Therefore I plan to act extra cautious, I cannot afford to ruin my future because of my past. Sometimes I wonder, is it really a big deal.”
“It’s certainly not an uncommon situation. We live in a modern society and pre-marital sex is not an alien term now. However, it's still a hush-hush issue. So if you think your partner will not be able to digest the truth about your past, then it's better to keep it to yourself. Still it's always advisable that if you have had a sexual relationship, you should go for a medical check up before you tie the knot,” Dr Chugh concludes.
Source:http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/articleshow/4314009.cms
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Woo Your Lady Love
A man would love to have a sex-kitten in bed ready to woo him in all exciting ways.
Descending his way to bed, he would expect his wild cat doing everything that ensures a gratifying session. But why just men have all the fun?
It’s high time they realise that even their partner needs to be aroused to feel the pleasure. After all, it’s a two way enjoyment that seeks equal participation from both the partners. Though enough has been said and heard about the ways to seduce a man but rarely does one steps up to woo a woman the way she likes it.
"Seduction is an art in itself and needs to be treated with a lot of care. Everyone prefers to be the ‘seduced’ rather than be the 'seducer'. The element of surprise is very important; getting the unexpected is a real turn on," says Dr Gitanjali Sharma, a relationship expert.
For a woman, a man's seduction skills are on test not just in bed but out of it too. So, all men out there – master the art of seduction that goes beyond the usual gesture of hugs and kisses.
Here are some useful ways to get your lady hooked on to you as you gear up for a hot steamy session...
Blindfold the beauty : Women love surprises, which indeed is the biggest turn on for them. The perfect way to seduce a woman is to blindfold her and let the passion heat build on. The surprise factor works wonders and of course, makes the job easier for men. During these moments, treat her with different tastes, different fragrances and different texture to heighten her senses! A casual rub up her arm close to her bossom or back may give her a different high but make sure to keep her blindfolded till the time she gets crazy.
Caution : Dr. Devesh Roy, a sex therapist adds, “Make an effort to know your partner’s trigger zones. Since most women are hesitant when it comes to undressing, a blindfold can be really helpful, as it comforts her in the best possible way. And what more, you can take advantage and get a bit naughty by touching her at the right spots.”
Truth or dare : This game may appear to be a slow verbal foreplay but it can do wonders. Women are usually less experimental or daring when it comes to trying out different techniques to seduce their man. But men can think out-of-the-box to woo their partner. Truth or dare, it can be a win-win situation for you. If it's truth, ask her something sexual and if it’s a dare then ask her to do something naughty. If she reciprocates the game in a way you want, then you’ve already won the game. This game in itself is super naughty and when played in the right mood becomes very sensual.
Caution : Remember your woman wants to test all your moods – from being romantic, naughty to a bit dirty and finally sexually aroused. Do not portray yourself as if you are hungry for sex. Keep your sexual gestures understated and during such a game, don’t expect her to do whatever you ask for! Be considerate towards her comfort zone and accordingly set the sexual mood,” warns Dr. Amita Mishra, sex and relationship expert.
Talk dirty : Bringing sexual elements into a conversation is a gateway towards actually doing it. Women might feel reluctant to include this in their list of seduction techniques, but a man can surely set the mood right for a sexually intimate discussion. Just bring up sex in a conversation in a general manner. For instance, talk about erotic scenes from different movies. As the conversation progresses, open up with her a little more and ask if she would like to act like that. Now once you’ve discussed sex openly, you can start working on your physical contact and then take things to the next level.
Caution : “Make sure that you don’t sound obscene or vulgar because that might turn off your woman. Keeping the conversation sexually inclined; try to retain the romantic element throughout, as it acts like a magic spell to arouse a woman,” suggests Dr. Kirti Mishra, a clinical physiologist and a relationship expert.
Taking on role-play : Men always expect their woman to seduce them by taking on role play. Be it of a nurse, a wild tigress or a porn star – role-playing has always played a crucial role during seduction moments. So, men too can make the most of it by enacting a character to seduce the girl. Now, it could be as wild as Tarzan or as superficial as a Superman. Just make sure it has all the elements to take your woman into a different world.
Caution : “Role-playing can go wrong at times, if your woman dislikes a particular character. So beware of her likes and dislikes. Don’t keep the role-play boring, involve her as well. Take her on a fantasy trip. Share your fantasies and tempt her in a manner that she cannot resist getting into some steamy action,” says Dr. Roy.
Sensuous cooking : Try this role reversal for a day and look for yourself how it works. A man who knows cooking is one thing but a man who cooks for his lady love is another. Display your culinary skills and cook something really special and exciting, of course of her choice! Adding ingredients with aphrodisiacal qualities will certainly be an add-on. Whatever you cook, don’t forget to sprinkle it with love, add a pinch of naughtiness, garnish it with romance and arrange for an exotic dining experience just for her.
Caution : “Simply cooking a few dishes can’t arouse your woman, so present her in a way that conveys a message to her. Make her feel special and let her know that you tried it all only for her love and affection. During the special dinner, serve her and keep expressing your desires that hints towards a night of passion,” advices Amita.
Texting love : Texting is easier than saying it out loud. And dirty texting is indeed the magic mantra to woo her. Get wild with your imagination and let your words do the talking for you. You should be at your confident best while your are texting and chances are that your oops can turn to a good move for you.
Caution : “Know exactly what turns her on – romantic messages or a bit dirty ones and play your wild cards accordingly. If she responds well and hints that she’s also charged for a romp, you better know what lies next! Don’t delay it further by wasting time to ask her out, just invite her comfortably and let love take over the rest,” says Dr. Kirti.
Fun unlimited : It’s official. Women like ‘funny men’ with a good sense of humour. Now it’s up to a man how he uses this humour to seduce his lady love. While dirty talking and sensual gestures can surely set the mood right, what matters the most are those little things that make your woman feel wanted. Crack jokes or kinky yet funny comments and as she splits into laughter, give her a pat or touch her hands in a happy gesture. Such humorous moments coupled with a physical touch is a modest way to seduce a woman.
Caution : “A woman may seem least interested in your humour and if that’s the case, recall some funny incidents that you had together. And if she is equally enjoying the rib tickling moments with you, then touch her tenderly and whisper words in her ears to keep up the physical contact. It can turn out to be a great seduction technique,” feels Dr. Roy.
Descending his way to bed, he would expect his wild cat doing everything that ensures a gratifying session. But why just men have all the fun?
It’s high time they realise that even their partner needs to be aroused to feel the pleasure. After all, it’s a two way enjoyment that seeks equal participation from both the partners. Though enough has been said and heard about the ways to seduce a man but rarely does one steps up to woo a woman the way she likes it.
"Seduction is an art in itself and needs to be treated with a lot of care. Everyone prefers to be the ‘seduced’ rather than be the 'seducer'. The element of surprise is very important; getting the unexpected is a real turn on," says Dr Gitanjali Sharma, a relationship expert.
For a woman, a man's seduction skills are on test not just in bed but out of it too. So, all men out there – master the art of seduction that goes beyond the usual gesture of hugs and kisses.
Here are some useful ways to get your lady hooked on to you as you gear up for a hot steamy session...
Blindfold the beauty : Women love surprises, which indeed is the biggest turn on for them. The perfect way to seduce a woman is to blindfold her and let the passion heat build on. The surprise factor works wonders and of course, makes the job easier for men. During these moments, treat her with different tastes, different fragrances and different texture to heighten her senses! A casual rub up her arm close to her bossom or back may give her a different high but make sure to keep her blindfolded till the time she gets crazy.
Caution : Dr. Devesh Roy, a sex therapist adds, “Make an effort to know your partner’s trigger zones. Since most women are hesitant when it comes to undressing, a blindfold can be really helpful, as it comforts her in the best possible way. And what more, you can take advantage and get a bit naughty by touching her at the right spots.”
Truth or dare : This game may appear to be a slow verbal foreplay but it can do wonders. Women are usually less experimental or daring when it comes to trying out different techniques to seduce their man. But men can think out-of-the-box to woo their partner. Truth or dare, it can be a win-win situation for you. If it's truth, ask her something sexual and if it’s a dare then ask her to do something naughty. If she reciprocates the game in a way you want, then you’ve already won the game. This game in itself is super naughty and when played in the right mood becomes very sensual.
Caution : Remember your woman wants to test all your moods – from being romantic, naughty to a bit dirty and finally sexually aroused. Do not portray yourself as if you are hungry for sex. Keep your sexual gestures understated and during such a game, don’t expect her to do whatever you ask for! Be considerate towards her comfort zone and accordingly set the sexual mood,” warns Dr. Amita Mishra, sex and relationship expert.
Talk dirty : Bringing sexual elements into a conversation is a gateway towards actually doing it. Women might feel reluctant to include this in their list of seduction techniques, but a man can surely set the mood right for a sexually intimate discussion. Just bring up sex in a conversation in a general manner. For instance, talk about erotic scenes from different movies. As the conversation progresses, open up with her a little more and ask if she would like to act like that. Now once you’ve discussed sex openly, you can start working on your physical contact and then take things to the next level.
Caution : “Make sure that you don’t sound obscene or vulgar because that might turn off your woman. Keeping the conversation sexually inclined; try to retain the romantic element throughout, as it acts like a magic spell to arouse a woman,” suggests Dr. Kirti Mishra, a clinical physiologist and a relationship expert.
Taking on role-play : Men always expect their woman to seduce them by taking on role play. Be it of a nurse, a wild tigress or a porn star – role-playing has always played a crucial role during seduction moments. So, men too can make the most of it by enacting a character to seduce the girl. Now, it could be as wild as Tarzan or as superficial as a Superman. Just make sure it has all the elements to take your woman into a different world.
Caution : “Role-playing can go wrong at times, if your woman dislikes a particular character. So beware of her likes and dislikes. Don’t keep the role-play boring, involve her as well. Take her on a fantasy trip. Share your fantasies and tempt her in a manner that she cannot resist getting into some steamy action,” says Dr. Roy.
Sensuous cooking : Try this role reversal for a day and look for yourself how it works. A man who knows cooking is one thing but a man who cooks for his lady love is another. Display your culinary skills and cook something really special and exciting, of course of her choice! Adding ingredients with aphrodisiacal qualities will certainly be an add-on. Whatever you cook, don’t forget to sprinkle it with love, add a pinch of naughtiness, garnish it with romance and arrange for an exotic dining experience just for her.
Caution : “Simply cooking a few dishes can’t arouse your woman, so present her in a way that conveys a message to her. Make her feel special and let her know that you tried it all only for her love and affection. During the special dinner, serve her and keep expressing your desires that hints towards a night of passion,” advices Amita.
Texting love : Texting is easier than saying it out loud. And dirty texting is indeed the magic mantra to woo her. Get wild with your imagination and let your words do the talking for you. You should be at your confident best while your are texting and chances are that your oops can turn to a good move for you.
Caution : “Know exactly what turns her on – romantic messages or a bit dirty ones and play your wild cards accordingly. If she responds well and hints that she’s also charged for a romp, you better know what lies next! Don’t delay it further by wasting time to ask her out, just invite her comfortably and let love take over the rest,” says Dr. Kirti.
Fun unlimited : It’s official. Women like ‘funny men’ with a good sense of humour. Now it’s up to a man how he uses this humour to seduce his lady love. While dirty talking and sensual gestures can surely set the mood right, what matters the most are those little things that make your woman feel wanted. Crack jokes or kinky yet funny comments and as she splits into laughter, give her a pat or touch her hands in a happy gesture. Such humorous moments coupled with a physical touch is a modest way to seduce a woman.
Caution : “A woman may seem least interested in your humour and if that’s the case, recall some funny incidents that you had together. And if she is equally enjoying the rib tickling moments with you, then touch her tenderly and whisper words in her ears to keep up the physical contact. It can turn out to be a great seduction technique,” feels Dr. Roy.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Married and desirable......( WhY Gals Prefer married Man )
Do married men get hit on because of the lure of the forbidden? We find out...
He's handsome, he's witty, he's successful... and he’s married! But will that stop other women from hitting on him? The answer is 'No', or so say a lot of women. But, what is it that increases the desirability quotient of a married man? His status clearly says he's 'taken', then why do so many women still fall for him?
Safe to play with!
"From what I have seen, women think married men are safer then single men. They can have all the fun with them and yet not feel stuck in a committed relationship," says legal consultant Prachi Malik. "Also, these women get all the advantages of being in a relationship without having to do his laundry, manage household chores, deal with his mood swings or have sex when he wants to. Those things are left for the wife to do," she quips.
It’s a game
Some women also see it as a game of competition. Airhostess Stuti Behl shares her experience. "I once had a friend who was constantly hitting on a married man at her workplace. The day he started returning her glances, she felt so kicked. I saw her completely changed. She pursued it more seriously and then few months down the line dumped him. It was a kind of thrill that she got out of that relationship."
Ego-booster!
Explains psychologist Samir Parikh, "It’s pure attraction for some. But, for some women who are low on self-esteem, it's a way of feeling self-assured. It's an achievement for them, a sort of an approval or validation that they are desirable to a man who has a woman to his disposal 24X7."
Merely the fact that he has been taken make some women more tempted to pursue him. Marketing Manager Prashant Vig adds, "Men feel similarly with married women. It's about tasting the forbidden fruit. It's always difficult to resist that temptation."
Some men invite such offers to get rid of boredom in their life. Agrees model Amanpreet Wahi, "Most of the married men around me who have extra-marital affairs shower their girlfriends with the best of gifts and treats. It's like a desperate attempt to have something fresh in their lives."
Experience counts!
These men are also seen as sexually skilled since they are able to satisfy their wife's sexual expectations. Says call centre executive Pooja Sinha (name changed), "This was the reason I felt terribly attracted to this guy at my workplace. We did have a short fling but then I couldn’t bear his constant blabbering about his wife. He was great in bed but I gave up on him."
Warns relationship expert R K Mehra, "Women and men both should be wary of forming such relationships. It can prove to be highly risky for their mental health. Some try to get adventurous and end up losing their self-respect."
Remember, you’re playing with fire!
Source: TOI [http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/articleshow/4255588.cms]
He's handsome, he's witty, he's successful... and he’s married! But will that stop other women from hitting on him? The answer is 'No', or so say a lot of women. But, what is it that increases the desirability quotient of a married man? His status clearly says he's 'taken', then why do so many women still fall for him?
Safe to play with!
"From what I have seen, women think married men are safer then single men. They can have all the fun with them and yet not feel stuck in a committed relationship," says legal consultant Prachi Malik. "Also, these women get all the advantages of being in a relationship without having to do his laundry, manage household chores, deal with his mood swings or have sex when he wants to. Those things are left for the wife to do," she quips.
It’s a game
Some women also see it as a game of competition. Airhostess Stuti Behl shares her experience. "I once had a friend who was constantly hitting on a married man at her workplace. The day he started returning her glances, she felt so kicked. I saw her completely changed. She pursued it more seriously and then few months down the line dumped him. It was a kind of thrill that she got out of that relationship."
Ego-booster!
Explains psychologist Samir Parikh, "It’s pure attraction for some. But, for some women who are low on self-esteem, it's a way of feeling self-assured. It's an achievement for them, a sort of an approval or validation that they are desirable to a man who has a woman to his disposal 24X7."
Merely the fact that he has been taken make some women more tempted to pursue him. Marketing Manager Prashant Vig adds, "Men feel similarly with married women. It's about tasting the forbidden fruit. It's always difficult to resist that temptation."
Some men invite such offers to get rid of boredom in their life. Agrees model Amanpreet Wahi, "Most of the married men around me who have extra-marital affairs shower their girlfriends with the best of gifts and treats. It's like a desperate attempt to have something fresh in their lives."
Experience counts!
These men are also seen as sexually skilled since they are able to satisfy their wife's sexual expectations. Says call centre executive Pooja Sinha (name changed), "This was the reason I felt terribly attracted to this guy at my workplace. We did have a short fling but then I couldn’t bear his constant blabbering about his wife. He was great in bed but I gave up on him."
Warns relationship expert R K Mehra, "Women and men both should be wary of forming such relationships. It can prove to be highly risky for their mental health. Some try to get adventurous and end up losing their self-respect."
Remember, you’re playing with fire!
Source: TOI [http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/articleshow/4255588.cms]
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